Remember,

Whispers through the leaves,

Today the sun shines,

I am fine,

Two months ago I almost died,

Losing the light of my life came at a price,

The darkest of nights,

Coldest of winter,

Refugee sinner,

On my hands and knees I begged God to take all of me,

A rope tied around destiny,

I let the world get the best of me,

Swang back and forth until the noose fell loose,

Hundred year old hardwood holds my blood,

Today I am a forgiven son,

I tried to find my way out and it set me free,

Beyond ways I can ever believe,

Tears of joy ring like praise in early morning,

I’m out the door instead of trapped on the bathroom floor,

Drowning out the silence with grace and compassion instead of death and disaster,

Hold your head high because our suffering is ending,

We have reached the beginning

The reflection of the roses spoke red onto all the walls,

Dried out and hung upside down,

I looked you in the eyes and said I’m out of this fight,

My life is considered a consistent night where the sun does rise,

Your light brings life to all the demons I hold inside,

You see them just as I and that isn’t right,

I’ll love you until the end of the time,

Until all the oceans roars grow silent you will be my life,

books-n-quotes:

“I was suddenly left with nothing in my hands but a handful of crazy stars.”

— Jack Kerouac, On the Road (via books-n-quotes)

There were times I wondered if I’d ever see eyes like yours,

We laid in the morning light off Oak Street and I ran my fingers across your skin wondering how I’d let you in,

You slept in peace and I lost myself in solitude,

The apartment was on fire as it set to flame the hair on the back of my neck,

It was an immediate ending I couldn’t neglect,

There was nothing that brought me to life the way you could,

We are so far apart but I find you everywhere,

Through the strangers on the street to the wind moving through my hair,

Light shined on that same street but how you shined through me,

Feeling mercy and rest a thought I’m unable to forget,

We found hope in the strangest places,

Abandoning all that we knew to start anew,

I dragged myself through the mud only to be left bloody, broken, and bruised,

Wiped the tears from my eyes and the light shined through,

When I thought everybody left I was just lost,

So far from the normality,

Laid awake and let the world take every part of me,

The sun fell and rose as the search went on for a place to call home,

Eyes glued to the horizon as the days turned to weeks and it ended up being years but now I am here,

Finding the long lost peace I’ve been searching for in all the pieces I thought were lost,

When the ceiling fan was my way out God let me in,

Oh how he let me in,

I kicked that chair out from underneath my legs and took one last breath,

I swang for what felt like minutes until the foundation fell through,

God cried out and said, “I’m sorry my son, now there is room.”

I told him “if you’d just save me I’ll never go back.”

I’ll live for you and plead for forgiveness in all my sins,

Blinded for so long and nowhere left to turn,

Looked at the past and watched it burn,

Flushed it down the sink or threw it all away,

There’s no hope in what has almost killed me,

The answers to my prayers isn’t the rope around my neck or the pills in my throat,

I don’t write like I used to and I don’t really care,

I see hope in everything everywhere,

Showing a little more grace and compassion my life is beyond my wildest imagination,

I am new I am free,

All I had to do was believe.